Signs Your Really Broke

# American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!"

# Your idea of a 7-course meal is taking a deep breath outside a fine restaurant.

# You're formulating a plan to rob the food bank.

# You've rolled so many pennies, you've formed a psychic bond with Abe.

# Long distance companies no longer call you to switch.

# Your credit card companies raised the rates from 6.9% to 24.9%.

# You see your roommate as a large fried chicken in tennis shoes.

# You receive care packages from Europe.

# Your bologna has no first name.

# You rob Peter...and then rob Paul.

# You finally clean your house, hoping to find change.

# You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.

# You give blood everyday - for the orange juice.

# McDonalds supplies you with all your kitchen condiments.

# Consumer Credit Counseling services said "No."

# The neighborhood dog stopped sniffing at your pockets.